My husband and I have been through a lot when it comes to babies. First we spent years trying to get pregnant with the twins (literally years…3 to be exact). After two surgeries and plans for IVF, we were able to get pregnant without the IVF – we found out one week before our IVF preliminary appointment that we were pregnant.
Then I had a twin pregnancy. Which is not the same as a normal pregnancy. A twin pregnancy is harder. I can’t imagine ever having a triplet or quadruplet or higher order multiple pregnancy because the twin pregnancy almost killed me. Again, I mean that literally. I almost died.
And then we got pregnant really easily without even trying when the twins were barely a year old. And we lost that baby around 7 weeks.
Then we spent another year trying to get pregnant, which we did. Only to lose that baby at 10 weeks.
Then we spent another 14 months assuming we just wouldn’t get pregnant again.
Only to actually get pregnant.
So here I am. 12 weeks pregnant. Waiting for this one to end, hoping it doesn’t, and worrying about what will happen in 6 months when it comes time to deliver. Will I develop preeclampsia again? Will I end up with HELLP again? Will I even remember being in labor this time? Will this baby actually make it to term?
Knowing that 90% of the problems I had in the last pregnancy were because I was carrying twins makes it easier to think I WON’T have those issues this time. But I also know it’s still a possibility. Chances of preeclampsia in subsequent pregnancies is higher if you’ve had it. I would assume that also means the chances of developing HELLP are also higher, since it’s a severe form of Preeclampsia.
So now we wait. We wait for February when we can, hopefully, bring a beautiful little girl or boy into this world.
And I try not to fall asleep at my desk.